Heya sorry to hear you have had such a head streak with your therapists. I have gender dysphoria and see a therapist because of that so that I can get onto the hormones. I also have a BSc in Psychology. By no means am I an expert on therapy.

What you describe is not what I experience or know through the studies. I was quite clear what I want out of my therapy, what issues I need addressed and my therapist has been guiding me through these. She is taking the time to listen to my pov and is mainly asking follow up questions. She provides an excellent mirror, tells me when I have an unhealthy response to stimuli or situations and asks me if I want to work on those now, later or never because I don’t see it as an issue.

She makes sure I feel safe and heard and we have made substantial progress. But I am also very open to all approaches she throws at me as well as open to any and all homework’s because I have also a professional interest in what she is applying.

Overall I would say you assess the therapist as much as they do you. You need to feel safe and heard, if they do not make a good match for you swap. It is laborious, tedious and annoying but I think well worth it.

Depending on where you are and how your situation is this is easier or harder but remember you don’t have to be there I person and you might be able to use online services. I once tried to verify the quality of betterhelp and the articles (peer reviewed not newspaper stuff) that I’ve found, deemed it to be overall good to very good. I am sure there are many more equally good or better out there. Maybe someone here has some hands on experience too with the online help and can give some better advise than I can.

You got this, don’t give up on therapy just yet. Wish you all the best!