I'm going to assert a few things up front:
- A company that is struggling to keep its head above water should not be paying 2.5 billion to shareholders. The mechanism - dividends or buybacks - is not the problem.
- There's a hidden assumption in your first statement. Just because dividends have always existed does not mean they necessary or optimal. I actually don't have an answer to that, only that it is an assumption worth challenging.
- I'm typing this on an M2 Macbook Air. It is an incredible technical achievement, and creating it provides real tangible value to society in its own small way that wouldn't have existed without Apple. Apple is not struggling.
- However, Apple has 164,000 Apple Store employees. Apple Stores are part of Apple's successful business strategy, and the retail employees are by extension part of Apple's success. How many of them are paid enough to make their jobs a career? That 14 billion comes out to ~$85k per Apple Store employee.
- 401(k)s are a terrible way to do retirement, and I say this as someone who has a shot at retiring. Crumbs being chucked at me doesn't change my stance. The stories of people who ran out from nursing home stints or medical bills or whatever are just starting to trickle out.
Since you are reading a lot into my comment I'm going to read a lot into yours. Why are things different now? The rules of the (United States) game changed, and checks against this behavior have been nullified. Value creation is a means to an end: acquire as much power as possible, and flex that to siphon value off for your shareholders.
That's what Unity is doing. They are flexing their power to extract value from its customers. If you use Unity, what are you going to do? Unreal is a different beast with a different target audience. Godot is untested, and I don't blame anyone that hesitates hitching themselves to a noncommercial open source project. Porting a game to a different engine may not even be realistic anyway.
So everyone will stomp their feet and complain and mostly keep on using Unity. Some day they'll push too hard and that'll be the end of them, but what do the shareholders care? They got paid. Onto the next one.
The 11 million is irritating given how it's more than most will make in a lifetime being paid to someone who is incompetent. The 2.5 billion is why Unity is forced to resort to destructive behaviors to stay afloat. The incentives for companies to act this, and lack of checks against it, are why the economy is broken.
This might not be what your friend is going for, but I smirked slightly and this is how I interpret it:
I particularly like jokes that take something absurd and launder it through the structure of things that do make sense. Everything in your friend's joke is factually true. It's structured as a logically consistent argument.
And yet it is completely nonsensical. No one has ever thought that windows make something move. It invoked a slightly confused response in me, which is why I found it funny.
It's not a great joke, but I might tell it to feel out someone's sense of humor plus whether they pick up on that I'm doing so. I think the analogy to Windows makes it a weaker joke, but I would give that as an explanation just to mess with someone a little.