Skip Navigation

InitialsDiceBearhttps://github.com/dicebear/dicebearhttps://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/„Initials” (https://github.com/dicebear/dicebear) by „DiceBear”, licensed under „CC0 1.0” (https://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/)T
Posts
3
Comments
226
Joined
1 yr. ago

Certified person, 100% someone.

  • Wowsers you still think I'm using an LLM and that I'm not just a complete moron with a boring desk job? Maybe you should go buy yourself some [insert adjective] ice cream.

  • Best I can do is a thermos full of cum with a toy missile in the middle

  • I don't build the cars I just make the memes 🤷‍♀️

  • I'm not sure, did you?

  • Imagine the fun those guys could have jacking eachother off instead

  • I'll trade you 6 buckets of piss and a snowblower that shoots cum in exchange for getting on this highly coveted blocklist

  • My neighbor's wife's dog's previous owner's dental assistant's husband somehow did the jump between timelines and told us about the timeline where Harambe didn't get murdered.

    It's not at all what you'd expect, in the other timeline some Elvis impersonator from Vegas became president in the 2016 and his first order of business was to order ICE to detain all Beatles fans and deport them to England. The cost of the operation bankrupted the nation and for some reason everyone blamed Harambe. A crowd of 2500 people marched to the zoo and lynched Harambe. Doing so resulted in an economic boom but also released some sort of respiratory virus that spread worldwide and caused millions of deaths. A few years later that guy from the apprentice became president and the timelines converged into the same situation we have now.

    In the end nothing changed except all the Beatles fans are in England now and they prevented Brexit so I guess that's pretty cool.

  • Ah the fabled sex dungeon Master

  • heater

    Jump
  • You gotta press it really hard to reset it but be careful because buttons that haven't been pressed in a long time are usually very cold

  • Dear monsieur Seth Rogen, please make my movie about the man who changes the label on his wife's rock tumbler to say "cock tumbler" which inadvertantly turns it into some kind of magic lamp type device like in Aladdin. The dick genie inside can grant you 3 wishes but they all have to be cock related. The genie smokes a dick shaped bong and laughs heheheheheheheheheheheh.

    Please give me 12 million dollars.

  • For 6 years going outside made me money so this meme just doesn't work for me. I was an autistic prostitute and every John's dong was a fidget spinner. I couldn't get enough of my job and the best part was all the outside time.

  • I hope they made out and jacked eachother off in the closet, otherwise I don't think the friendship will last.

  • If you use a damaged cable it cooks the bird with the power of electricity gifted to us by America's favorite gay couple Thomas Tesla and Nikola Edison.

    It's my favourite way to cook a bird for my great grandma's Nantucket bird dick casserole.

  • Deleted

    Permanently Deleted

    Jump
  • George Costanza's Caribbean dog dick Bonanza is today. I heard it's a blast if you're a dog.

  • This is the receptionist at my doctor's offices husband's truck. He's always trying to get me to play some videogame he developed called "monkey crunchers from dog cock Island". I told him I'm not interested but he keeps following me around assuring me that the title has nothing to do with the game itself and that it's actually a soccer game like FIFA but with crabs vs lobsters. I asked him why he chose that name for a crustacean soccer game and he became irate and threatened to reverse my vasectomy.

  • You'd be surprised at the shit people cry about. Free foreskin onions, hotdog and coconut salad, masonry paint on cars, dead children...etc.

  • My favorite way to make them cry is to stuff a cocktail onion in my foreskin before my neighbor's great aunt goes down on me in the McDonald's parking lot and then SURPRISE!

  • By following these easy steps:

    1. Go to craft supply store and buy clay.

    2. Press clay along a broomstick to make a mold.

    3. Bake it.

    4. Pour piss from bucket into mold

    5. Freeze it

    6. Remove frozen piss from mold

    7. Have me sit on the fridge and use the frozen piss broomstick as a butt dildo

    8. I get startled by flat earth disc and hop off fridge with frozen piss broomstick in my ass and get impaled.

    9. Collect life insurance and donate to the flat earth society.

  • Fuck me with a bucket of pee, I had no idea the earth was so flat compared to other planets.